Part I: Think of the armoires, people!

I got a trouble-ticket at the close of work yesterday:

One of the guest chairs in [co-worker]'s office amputated its own arm in an attempt to free itself from the building this weekend. If you could reattach it before any nerve damage occurs that would be heroic. Thanks!

For once, it was an easy fix. However, I wasn't going to let this massive wrongdoing go unnoticed...

I think you're missing the bigger issue. Chairs don't just 'up and run'. There is almost always a larger pattern of abuse, especially when a chair causes itself damage during an escape attempt.

I will be reporting [co-worker] to the authorities for furniture abuse, and I hope the judge throws the bookshelf at him.

Until such time as justice is served, the chair has been physically repaired, but the emotional trama will take years to heal.

Why, people? Why must we live in this kind of world?

-DH

Part II: Justice!

A reponse to my response:

Oh behalf of the chair, I am deeply and sincerely grateful. This is certainly a step in the right direction and I will be in touch with HR to arrange further counseling in order to address the longer term impact of this tragedy. I will also ensure that they understand that said bookshelf will require similar attention once it is so flagrantly used as an innocent tool by the justice system.

Some people just get me...

-DH